No longer as truthful as should be deserved, some names, places and events deliberately vague to protect identities that aren't mine

Sunday, 17 January 2010

Remember kids: God Hates Fangs

So Fangtasia last night was EPIC. Not as much bitey fun as was promised (though I was restricted on that front anyway - I had a 'no marks rule' as I was being a model for a photography group the next day)

After some delays in picking up the lycan one (dressed as a cowboy, hat and boots an' all) we eventually got back to mine. Joel had wangled his way out of work and came over as he was already way ahead of us on the getting ready (read: gaying it up) part of the evening.

Finding our way to a suitably unmarked backstreet east end warehouse, whose only giveaway was the music thumping out of it late at night, and paying our measly £5 to make it past the door check, we found ourselves in a room full of the young and the beautiful (and some not so much, but hey, we're not allowed to shoot fuglies yet), dressed in the finest burlesque, goth, victoriana, and punk caberet (thank you AP) that camden/primark/a sewing machine would grant them. Soft drinks were cheap, and alcohol was pretty reasonable for a london venue. Cloakroom consisted of a rail and other people's good will at the back of the room, and toilets were those fun kind where its a communal queue with a door that doesn't shut at the other end with someone banging on it telling you they need to get ready for a show in there.

Show-wise, we had vampire bat burlesque, an awesome country/bluegrassy style band, who did a country version of 'its a nice day for a white wedding', which was much to mine and the Lycan's approval, a burlesque show with a lot of knife waving and fake blood profusions, and a suspension bondage thing.

There were some issues, the sound was not the best, they need to learn how to turn on microphones, and everytime the music changed source, it came in at completely the wrong level for the first 10 seconds till they noticed. The suspension bondage was a little cringe inducing if you knew what was going on, the knots were not ideal, the woman had a look of fear and unconfidence whilst doing it, and seemed to be hoping for the best, she got very stuck at one point, and really needed to shave, but the crowd enjoyed it. What was amusing, is that they used part of the aria from Lucia di Lammermoor (which incidently, I'm seeing at some point, yeys). The part the used you'll probably all know better as the diva dance from the fifth element, it's an awesome piece of music, and the version they were using was a goth industrial sounding version of it. And not only that, but they'd used the full techno remix version of it as found in the fifth element, so you got the crazy dancey bit after the actual singing of the italian. I was also muchly impressed that Joel knew the actual opera, rather than just the fifth element source for it. Knife wavey blood spurtey woman also released too much blood at once, making it fairly unrealistic.

And to top the list of issues off, we only saw one person being bitten in the entire night, and that was on the way out. Joel, Naps and I, think we should take over and do the demos, band, and sound respectively :P

That being said... I did call the night epic. THe god hates fangs woman was AMAZIONG, and asked us to accept jesus into our lives. Joel got a sticker out of it, and a pamphlet that told us how dressing vamp would lead us down the same road as drugs and homosexuality. Awesome. She was dressed in a suitably immaculate cream white suit, with pearls and a tight bob hairstyle. Loves it. She inspires me to conduct an impromptu exorcism at the next one with Joel, so the priest and her can get involved too.

Joel completely missed a boy flirting with him, and it has only dawned on him 13 hours later that the girl who introduced her cute gay friend to him, was acting as wingwoman. Never fear though, for he has found the boy on facebook. We were bitching with the two of them over the lack of biting, which says good things about possible interests the boy might have... Joel and I were also suitably taken by the guy who had an entire arms worth of branding on him - says something inviting about his tolerance levels.

If you like the alternative scenes in London, this is a night I strongly recommend; if nothing else it's a mere £5 entry, which is a lot better than Crimson will cost me next month.

Speaking of Crimson, which is next saturday's excursion, I get my contact lenses on wednesday, I have the waistcoat all pinned up, I just need to find some Brocade during the week to recover it with so it coordinates with the venetian mask, and I need to find some new buttons for the shirt as half of them have come off. I love my costume, it's gonna be awesome. And there will be no silly no marking rules for me at Crimson, so I fully intend to come away with a souvenir, or many...

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