No longer as truthful as should be deserved, some names, places and events deliberately vague to protect identities that aren't mine

Monday, 24 May 2010

The natural frequency

My flatmate's friend found my blog.  Randomly it appears.  And she read it, and then drunkenly informed me the other night that whilst, in some of it, I do come across as psychotic, which is understandable really; it's me, that a lot of what I said made sense and it was reassuring to read someone else being like that.  She told me how great it was that I'm so honest with what I write on here.  I confessed that I've often thought about deleting things here, or re-editing them, or clarifying them, but that would defeat the point of the blog.  I'm trying to write the things I don't have the confidence to tell people, the little white lies, and darker, that just make life simpler.

One post that does seem to have resonated with a lot of you, is my post about lying.  I've had a surprising/worrying amount of you messaging me, talking to me, IMing me, whatever, saying how you related to it.  Most especially the point about not being able to tell the difference between your truths, and the lies you've convinved yourself are true.  Maybe this says more about the kind of people I have in my life, that the generality of my psychotic musings...

In the spirit of truth however, I am compelled to write, that my flatnate's friend naturally told my flatmate about my blog.  This being the flatmate I bitch about in a previous post.  And drunkenly she ended up tlaking to me about it.  I fairly honestly, explained that it was largely a week where a character trait of hers was particuarly pissing me off, and normally it doesn't and I do it too, but sometimes things just piss you off about people.  And whilst she drunkely blew it off, the fact she kept mentioning it gives me the impression that it really bothered her.  She's a lot more fragile than she'd like anyone to think, or me to acknowledge on this blog, which she will now inevitably read, but I think what I said got to her in that paranoid was that eats at you.  I don't particuarly feel bad about this, not to say I'm glad about it either, but it was just an interesting observation.

Finally, I have, for the first time, posted more blog posts than there are days in the month.  And there's still a week to go, whoo!

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