I've been left absolutely floored and stunned by something someone said to me earlier this evening.
It's 3 hours later and I'm still trying to process the concept of it.
My absolute dreamfantasy, Kaleb Scott tweeted me saying "You're so fucking hot."
I should probably explain who Kaleb Scott is for those who don't know.
I've been wanking about Kaleb Scott for as long as I can remember, I don't know when I stumbled across him, but I was definitely still a teenager. He was this gorgeous, stunning, horny porn star in a bunch of piss videos. He was the first young guy I'd come across in porn that was properly kinky and sleazy. Not just twink-in-a-leather-harness 'sleaze'. I've never considered age a factor. I'm happy playing with older guys. Age isn't even a thought process I have when it comes to whether I'm attracted to a guy or not. But here was this young guy. He was filthy. He was experienced. He loved it. He was proud of it. He felt normal.
I couldn't tell if I wanted to be him, to play with him, to date him, to thank him. I still can't.
I remember having printed out pictures of him I would jack off to when I was still confused and working out my sexuality. I remember scouring the internet for every single bit of porn he ever did. He's still absolutely drop dead gorgeously stunning. We got talking on twitter a while ago and I tried to meet up with him last time I was in San Francisco and he was quite up for it but in that way that life happens, things got in the way and it never came to pass
That is the guy that told me he thinks I'm hot today.
I still don't think I've managed to quite pick my jaw up. He later reiterated his statement to #superaggressivefb in a conversation they've been having Wow moment doesn't begin to express it. This post doesn't. It's not just a case of being starstruck. It's the fact he was so formative for me. Such a moulding factor on my idea of kink and that it was okay and that I could want to be a slutty boy and have fun and it would all still be okay and others would find that hot too. It's not every day your teenage idol turns around and calls you fucking hot.